Today's News


Elon's DOGE has fired a whole raft of nuclear experts as part of his clean up. Only toi find that it was these guys who were looking after the US's nuclear deterrent.
Apparently the employees had 15 minute interviews with a couple of pre-pubescent Muskrats in order to justify their jobs. The nerds didn't understand, and the experts were fired. Then rehired. Then fired again.

The US nuclear deterrent is currently being looked after by Betty from HR.
Source: The Independent

In other news, J D Vance (Secret service call sign 'couchfucker') tried to school the EU on democracy and freedom of speech. He then shuns the German Chancellor and went to have a one on one with the head of the German Nazi party (sorry AfD).
Source: Euro News